"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house." Matthew 5:14-15

"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it." Matthew 13:45-46

Monday, October 26, 2009

When Life Throws Lemons

I have to admit, it's been a difficult weekend. On Friday I learned that I have skin cancer. Now I know that this is usually very treatable, but honestly I find I am afraid. I am not looking forward to the procedure when the spot will removed while I'm fully awake. I'd much rather be put to sleep throughout it all. But apparently that is not an option. I face questions like, "How will I know if they got it all? What if it has spread to other parts of my body?".... I know I am not to live in fear. I am still in process of dealing with the news I suppose. Cancer is something that I have always feared. I know that God is bigger than anything I face. I need strength for this moment and then the next and the next....

On top of learning about cancer, we also were hit with other difficult things as well. My first reaction normally would be to go run for the chocolate. They say when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Well I would much rather eat a lot of chocolate brownies. I didn't do either of these things. No brownies or lemonade were present in my home this weekend! :) I have been clinging to the fact that Jesus loves me and knows what is best for me. I know I can trust Him, even when I am scared, hurt, frustrated, etc.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:11-13

This is what I cling to this day. I choose to eat healthy things and not get overwhelmed by what God has allowed in my life. May He be my portion this day (and every day)!

2 comments:

Anne said...

God surely loves your family so much to send such crosses your way. Our faith helps us through the crosses not avoid the crosses. He is with you and will never abandon you. Just focus on Him and His Love throughout the procedure. I know it is scary, but fling all that fear upon Him. He is a big God and can take all of our emotions.

We will pray for 'clean edges' for your biopsy and that they are able to get all the skin cancer with no chemo or radiation follow-up. Both my dad and Mark's sister have had melanoma, so we do know what you are going through. Dad has had many bouts of melanoma and all have been caught early and removed surgically.

Do you have the procedure scheduled yet? The wait can also be hard but know that you have many sisters-in-Christ lifting you up!

Blessings,
Anne

Marilyn in Mississippi said...

I also can relate to your apprehension about your skin cancers having had two removed at diffrent times myself. And, yes, it is scary. But my doctor always made sure that she "got it all". I pray that you will have the anxiety taken away by the Lord and that the procedure goes easy for you. Please keep us posted as to what happens!

May God bless you!

Marilyn...in Mississippi