Have you ever struggled with your friendships as a woman and wondering where you fit in? This thought has been heavy on my heart the past week or so. I have been praying and asking God about this very thing. Perhaps I just have been missing my friend that moved to Georgia, but I think it might be more than that. I have many women that I talk to when I am at church, but I really don't have anyone that I am very close to - no confidante. Someone that you can call up and spontaneously do something together.
Most all of my life I have felt like I lived on the fringes. Never one to be in the popular crowd. I have always been shy and quiet, even still to this day. In the majority of friendships I have had through the years I have been more of a listener than a talker. But lately I have been desiring a sense of belonging.
I happen to be a volunteer with Proverbs 31 Ministry in North Carolina. There isn't a whole lot that I can do since I live far away in PA. But I look at these women that are in ministry together and I see that sense of belonging and friendship, and that is something that I desire too. I desire for women to see the need to be counter-cultural and to be excited about their faith in Jesus. Part of me wishes that I lived in North Carolina so I could have more contact with these ladies. Sometimes I feel like I am the only one in my church that has convictions like I do. (No, I'm not saying that I am a perfect person - I am far from it). But I see a lot of people that there every day life doesn't match their Sunday life.
But then I struggle with desiring that sense of belonging. I know women friendships are important, but I can't lose sight that my true worth and value come from the Lord. Only in Him can I find true sense of worth. I pray that I will be able to find that balance and also find a new friend that happens to feel the way I do about spiritual things.
How about you? Do you happen to struggle with this or am I the only one?